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I Love You I Hate You♦Ever since you left, when we depart and say our goodbyes, I always seem to hang a left, when the right half walks the other way, never a steady step on my bumpy ground, sometimes the hurt i feel inside is enough to make me give up on my life, the need to see you, is like the hunger that lead you away, sitting here without you, hurts to think that I could take advantage of my attention not soaking you in, I want to go find you, but no clue where to begin, why haven't you called me, why do I just grin and bare it, I mistake pain for gain, hope for suckers, lies for truth, all I want is you, on second thought nope, I can't stand you, wait I'm madly in love with you, more like mad at you, I truly hate you, forever love you, I hate you, I love you, I hate me, I love hate, looking inside my heart, you will see the above underlined, sealed up and sent to you...♥
where it has beenFor the grace of my own to left feet, my posture seems to dilapidated my feeble pouncing heartbeat, I'm ferocious, taking the last pill on the face of the planet, sacrilege its a cult wisdom, proper word speak now and forgive me later, i just got bombarded by lightly coded number trails and spiral dimensions..
Tangled and MangledToday I recognize Im hopelessly tragic, committed at birth, the loss of feeling important, so over my years I grew against anyone that wanted to heart me right, showed time and time again that im not rememberable, hey wuts her fuck is here, to late for anyone to fix me, stepping bomb out of my world, i sabotage myself then go out to find a situation worse then mine, help in anyway I can when they feel relief they strap there jet pack and fall off the face of the planet, until next time they want to acknowledge someone to make them feel alright. I will be here waiting against my will pondering my life...
AutoFill hereAutoFill here <3. As we stand up against all the things that deprive our adventure, we shAll stutter at the insignificant amount of light that is deemed to busy for life...
Travel to The manh0le...As I reflect on the passed days, I make sure my face contains no grey, fancy is the wardrobe detailed today, I keep getting involved it means nothing I know this, for fun or for visual, hope is for SuckerS, I mean this, care for me, it's unlikely to help the bleeding, paint with the puss from within these mermaid sore's, Im time traveling, I drank to much of your time...Free for all, but one at a time...
Just a speck in a crowd of many....I am suppose to learn something from all this I know this, It all can't be for no reason that I am living and breathing, the universe want's something for me, I am not sure if it is something positive or not,,, I take a deep breathe as I watch the trees sway in the breeze, this town is a faulty death of me, I came prepared with a speech...I'm not taking anymore of this, I will not be bullied to think this is it, I'm just bored I think thinking too much into these life things....
The sound of broken glassI want to be free,
From feeling like I'm incomplete,
Not even for me...
As I fall,
Bless Me, said the Bee,
Interesting what life brings,
Hold up to Par,
I feel I don't hold up at all,
I got stung by my own thoughts,
Lonely,,I just wimper&crawl,
Into what's left of what's lost,
So bring it all,
Or don't bother,I will get there regardless...
@SH MAN MY SKIN SANK, MY HEART CURDLED FROM THE WORD'S IN YOUR STORY'S, I WASN'T ALONE IN MY ACHE, IT WAS OURS, WE HAD SOMETHING BUT IT IS NO MORE, I MISS GOOD TIME'S, I MISS MY OLD LIFE, BUT DAY'S GO BY, THEY TURN INTO MONTH'S, NEXT,BEFORE YOU KNOW IT, IT'S BEEN YEAR'S, NEVER REGRET THE MISTAKES, NEVER TAKE ANYTHING BACK, LEARN THIS TIME, FEED YOUR HURT, MY PAIN AND SUFFERING, DOSE YOURSELF EXTRA COMATOSE, GET IT WHILE IT'S HOT, KNEEL ON THE BOARD, SPLINTER'S COVER MY WHOLE WORLD....
Beam me Up
My brain did a Freudian Slip, quantum jump thru space and time, Cosmic displays of graceful taste's, come more appealing, peel off the dirt and blister finger splits all the way to your knuckles, I can't pray, I am prey, all I do is meditate for revival, you think it's going to work? ~M.f.R~
Master.My mind, my master.
My heart, a disaster.
Life's not going anywhere,
but it's definitely getting faster.
JigsawI am a puzzle
Each piece is a part of my life
Its one that takes decades to finish
It doesnt happen over night.
Each piece of the puzzle contributes to who i am
But its more than an image, you see
Alone its just a simple aspect
But put it all together, and you have me
Some are small, but so dear to my heart
Others are jagged and feel like they dont fit
Some might be tough to place, but never quit
Heres to all the pieces, no matter where they are
The good times,
The bad times,
The stories for every scar.
They might seem disastrous when they fall into our lives,
But its what make me, me
One piece at a time
The pieces for passion
The ones for never giving up
The ones for falling in love with music
The ones for finding happiness in pain
For the times laughing until you cry,
Playing guitar until your fingers bleed,
For loving what you do and what it does for you,
For never questioning your beliefs
For the times you learnt the hard way,
The hardships youve came by,
The times you thought you
Denial (shadows the blackest parts of me)I am fearful to find the meaning
Of why I’ve become what I’ve become
Of what it means to be me
Still I peel off my skin
My eyes fill up with guilt
Of what I know I fear
I know what change is coming
As I tear away the layers
I surrender to the pain again
Whilst deconstructing my constructive self
My former repressed suppression
And as the memories come rushing in
I'm vulnerable and bare again
I see now why I hurt myself
Time and time again
I curse at a past I could not control
My ego laughs at me from afar
I am aware of my one true story
Wounded closure in my soul
I reach out towards the lucid lights
The ones I see outside
I now know myself enough to know
I am no longer a prisoner inside
Reverting BackFalling again from the cliffs of victory,
Reverting back to the old ways,
In such a fast pace
From our last place…
Why did it take so long for us
To realize our loneliness for good?
Maybe it is how we should
Live our lives.
No one expects a miracle to come true,
No one expects everyone to find me and you,
No one understands all that we've been through,
And no one believes in what we are going to do.
To feel for us there is no reason,
Or at least we do not know,
These winds are foreign,
Towards us they never blow.
To say goodbye to love we’re ready,
To enjoy our hearts beat slow and steady,
Away from pain, away from theft
And there are still so many colors left.
Vaya!Oh, dulzura, ¿realmente he estado equivocado?
Con aquella ruptura con mi lado más humano,
¿he errado? Mi alma estaba segura, mas,
¿a dónde me llevará mi interior desolado?
Quizás llamase y me fuese con poca fortuna,
poca es poco: mínima, a mala suerte condenado.
Quizás haya sido cruel, puede que de hambruna,
puede que obligase y puede que ahora sufra.
Pues, ¿qué soy ahora más que un cascarón?
Siento, mas solo siento a mi razón,
mi corazón está loco y yo, cuerdo. Aterrador.
Atiéndeme, demonios, ¿a qué me veo avocado yo?
¿Realmente he probado el estar a solas?
¿O he estado en ilusión? Alienado en mi rosas
sin saber qué sucede por mi ambición: loca.
Espero saber ahora dónde estoy en mi prisión.
UntitledI feel my lungs collapsing
I can't stop my head from spinning.
It hurts to breathe. I'm gasping.
I can't keep it down I find myself thinning.
I can't feel my hand.
It's numbing as I no longer feel my blood circulating.
I'm so dizzy, I can't stand.
"What's wrong with me?" I ask myself as I sit there waiting.
A room so cold on a bench too high.
My legs dangle from the stool with my hands on my thigh.
A tall man enters with too white of a coat.
Asks me questions and writes them as notes.
It's a mess.
I have no strength to get out of bed.
I have to focus to be able to breathe.
I feel pressure pounding on my head.
I'm scared. I don't understand what's happening to me.
Writing at OxfordBetween the dusty pages of
drunken novellas and tragic plays,
a small ferret creeps and a young girl strays.
Enticed by a fantasy mirror and
lightly cut by a subtle blade,
the fabrics between worlds gently part
and literature is new and made.
A delicate array of alternate ideas
welded together within the parchment of a book.
Be careful how far you peer between
the never-ending lines of flowing ink.
Beware of your ever changing daemons and
ensure you don’t fall for their trick.
For they would have you think that
there is nothing more behind these shelves.
The truths they do hastily conceal as
there is more than you could ever believe.
Keep your friends closer, your enemies closer still.
You’ll never know where you may meet as
you hide behind your wandering quill.
On Wax WingsSpeak not softly
of your troubled fate
Huddled late, cross at the
Loss of doubled rates
Prostitute your sorrows
til the morrow can't come
Mind: scant and numb,
You borrowed some horrors
For you to Tell, See, Believe
Starve her beastly cheap when she's deceived,
Upheaved and ruptured,
As you yet corrupt her,
Leave her upstirred in life's broken structures
Who ever said you can see beyond the sun?
Beyond the moon, the sword, and beyond the gun?
Who ever claimed you could walk the seven seas
Through heaven's fire and through its dreaded breeze?
And thread with ease a Gordian knot at whim, known,
While playing your accordion hot with prim tones,
and prone to the thoughts of the world before you
Kneel, adore you to the core you deplore through?
Prostitute your every degradation
Blame it all off with prevarication
Declare with patience that you just can't face it
Deny your dishonesty, then embrace it
You harmed me,
Lied, defied, denied
And tried to get by
on wax wings to fly too high
"1 WaY 0F Dist0rteD ThinkinG" Control fallacies is your way of distorted thought, on the upper side of life, you left me out, hanging at the corner store, between the social disease and 6th St, I wasn't dressed to betray myself, neither to impress the clan's custom fire dance.... My head is to heavy to lay it to bed, it causes a chain reaction, to go straight to the chest, I don't breathe, it makes me get uneasy, cramps in my belly, that tense up my back, thoughts and words invade my mind, making replayed memories that crush my sight, to intense for everyone to know me, to lightly spoken to be remembered, I crash into burdens like I can make them better...
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More